stop apologizing in emails
CONFIDENCE IS KEY.
This is a mantra I have used since I was a freshman in high school. It is something our P.E. and Health teacher would say to us over and over. I think that self-confidence is a HUGE part of respect. You have to take yourself seriously for others to take you seriously. I see people, women especially, struggle with self-confidence in the workplace and I WANT TO HELP! Below are some tips that I have taken from other podcasts and social media that have been EXTREMELY helpful for me.
STOP SAYING “JUST”.
You are not “just” checking in, you are checking in. You do not “just” want to clarify instructions, you want to clarify instructions. You are not “just” wondering if you can leave early for an appointment, you need to leave early for an appointment and will catch up on whatever you missed.
I learned this tip from the Ladygang podcast and it has really changed my vocabulary. I now NEVER use the word just in emails and really try to be more conscious of it while I am speaking.
One more thing to think about this is using the word “just” when you are describing yourself and your career. You are not “just” a photographer, you are a photographer. You are not “just” an intern, you are an intern who is benefiting the organization and actively looking for the next step. You are not “just” a student, you are a student who is studying engineering and gaining knowledge in your field.
Take control, sound more confident, stop saying “just.”
2. STOP APOLOGIZING FOR DELAYS IN RESPONSE
99% of the time in the workplace, you do not owe someone an immediate response, especially after hours or on the weekends. I am using 99% of the time as a figure of speech, but you know what I mean. If someone sends you an email in the morning and you email them back in the afternoon, that is usually perfectly fine. If it is really an immediate need, you will know, this is not about those cases. Also, think about it, if it is really, REALLY crucial - they will call you or text you.
We put SO MUCH pressure on ourselves when someone asks us to complete a task or answer a question to give them an answer immediately. I struggle with this, I am not perfect. I want to help everyone as quickly as possible but if I really think about it, I don’t mind if someone takes a couple hours to respond, even a day to respond, as long as I get the information by the time I need it.
Instead of saying “Sorry for the delay on this” or “I apologize for the delay in response” say “Thank you for your patience…” HOW MUCH MORE CONFIDENT DOES THAT SOUND? You do not need to apologize when you are getting your stuff done within a reasonable amount of time.
3. STOP APOLOGIZING FOR MISTAKES IN EMAIL
I have a lot of pride. If there is one of the seven deadly sins that I struggle with most, it is pride. But, constructive criticism is extremely important in the workplace. We must embrace the criticism and use it to grow. And here’s the deal, EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES. You do not need to apologize for all of the little things because those will always be there, for everyone. I do think you need to apologize if you make a major mistake and I think you should do that IN PERSON. This is about emails though so stop apologizing for little mistakes in emails.
First of all, do not take it personally if someone is critiquing your work. 99% of the time (figure of speech again) it is not a personal attack, it is to make the organization as a whole better. If someone is correcting an error that was made or telling you where you can improve, use that as fuel to improve.
Instead of saying “I am so sorry for my mistake” or “Sorry I missed that!” say “Thank you for for catching that!” or “Thank you for bringing this to my attention” or even “Thank you for the critique.” Let those who are finding mistakes that you appreciate them looking out for you. You sound immensely more confident and serious in your work when you do not apologize for tiny mistakes. Why would you make yourself look less than you are? Why would you make something seem like a bigger mistake than it is? Don’t do it! Apologize, in person, for the big stuff and stop sweating the small stuff.
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There are so many more ways to uplevel your email vocabulary but these are the top three for me!
STOP SAYING “JUST”
STOP APOLOGIZING FOR DELAYS IN RESPONSE
STOP APOLOGIZING FOR MISTAKES IN EMAIL
For more information on this topic listen to episode #13 of pish posh with Lindsey Wilson - per my last email!
LISTEN HERE
I want to remind you that I got these tips from social media and podcasts. Sometimes the best advice that will change your career is not from the usual places like books and college classes.
I do need to credit two posts who inspired this post - one was a tweet from @themayaann and one was an instagram post from @danidonovan. The pictures are below and the handles for both of the original posters are there.
Thank you for reading and thank you for not apologizing in emails anymore. I am so happy that YOU are going to be a more confident and respected person in your career!
Cheers!
Lindsey